I want you to know you MATTER. You being HAPPY matters. You having what you need is the most important thing in the world.
(Nice start. No pressure… Let’s back up.)
I remember reading a blog post once, about finding your life purpose. It said (which I poo-pooed at the time) that you will know what your life purpose is when you find it because it will make you cry.
I never really feel comfortable with ‘life purpose’-type conversations because they somehow don’t seem very productive. I’ve spent absolutely years trying to feel important and wanting my life and actions to mean something, but the thought of seeking out what you are supposed to be doing with your life feels like quite a lot of pressure to me.
But every now and then I’ll meet a thought or an idea that will open up a big empty hole inside me and make me cry with an overwhelming sense of gratitude, relief and a sense that someone has seen inside my soul. It’s pretty weird.
And I store those ideas in a secret compartment in my head. As clues.
At those times, I sense there might be something in it, but in the end there doesn’t seem to be anything to do other than to get on with your life. Trying to identify your life purpose, in the end, just becomes another reason why you’re not ready to start.
Apart from that, I’ve come to secretly suspect that your life purpose is actually to be who you are.
Which is what I really want when I write about letting yourself have the good stuff in life, or enjoying yourself to the full. I think that actually what makes you happy does so because it’s where you feel what it’s like to be you
I reckon far too much of this world is geared up to stop you being be happy, wanting to pursue the things that make you happy or even feeling like you deserve to be happy at all.
It’s like we’re all on self-destruct.
But why does it even matter? I mean, we all have to get on and pay the bills, right?
The thing is, I’ve read evidence that people find ways to not only pay the bills but far exceed their earning expectations, and they’re still not happy so there’s something not right in the world. The real problem is more insidious than that.
The real problem is that when we’re shut down and working on auto-pilot just to survive then we can be having a pretty miserable time. And an unhappy person, well, isn’t the kind of guy you want to hang around with at parties.
If, as I suspect, that being happy is your clue that you’re doing things in line with who you really are, and who you really are is who you’re supposed to be, then being happy is about the most important thing you can do in the world. If you still don’t hold any truck with the life purpose thing, then let’s look at this in a practical way:
- When I’m happy because I’m having fun I feel about 10 years younger and have more energy to share. When I’m around happy people, I feel inspired and lifted up and, well, I feel happy too. Good start.
- Sometimes I’m happy because I’m really in the Zone. I’m using strengths and skills that, when I’m down in the dumps, I’ll never believe it’s possible to have. This makes me useful.
- When I’m happy I have ideas. It’s like the more I do that’s fun and inspiring, the more ideas come my way. Some of these ideas are good for me, and a whole heap of them are about helping other people.
- More importantly, I feel confident enough to believe in these ideas and do something about them.
Basically, I think being more happy (more you) helps you resist the constant onslaught of fear- and self-hatred based marketing (anti-ageing cream, anyone?) and take less note of the relentless media manipulation that thrives on you feeling small and insecure. When you’re enjoying yourself and acting on your off-the-wall ideas, you stop believing there is no other way and just go out and find that other way for yourself. You find a way to get what you need, then you go out and help others get what they need.
While you’re doing that, you become an example.
I mean, if you can do it, why can’t I?
Unhappy people are powerless; happy people are powerful.
Stop waiting to be happy – we need you.